Barcelona - Day Two | 23rd April 2013
It’s morning and with full steed, I take to narrow streets of Barcelona to get a sense of what city life is like, but as the Spanish have their siestas between 9 – 5, there’s no one around. There’s is nothing going on, it resembles the livestock of stables near a Findus factory. Horse jokes are still relevant, right?
With lack of entertainment being supplied by the general populace and uninterested by the intriguing architecture, I look to the pavement. There’s something particularly European about it, the arrangement of concrete and ominous stains and its colourful array of varied browns. I’m not disgusted by this, as I know, if I’m ever drugged and dumped in a random location, I could treat the pavement as a barcode and know instantly where I am in the world, within a square mile.
I grow weary of scanning the pavement and look up. I now seem to be on a hill overlooking the city; mountains in the distance guard the medley of sun-baked colourful lowrises with a few buildings poking out to the break the uniforms cityscape as is flows into a very blue Mediterranean sea. It’s all typically picturesque, so much so, I took a photo and descend from the hill to stop off in a café for a quick coffee.
Taking my espresso, I look round to observe the café’s patrons and where to sit. On each table, there was a lonely middle aged women looking forlornly at the table, at least they were until I walked in, like the stallion I am, that’s when their eyes lit up and followed me around the room like the rays that follow your hand from a static electricity plasma lamp.
There was one in particular, an overweight haggard version of Vivienne Westwood. Perusing my attention by subtly adjusting her hair as if she was in a shampoo commercial and pouting her lips as if the bottom half of her face was caught in vacuum cleaner’s hose.
Being the coward of confrontation and awkward moments, I down the espresso right there and then, scalding my throat in the process, place the coffee back on the counter to the owner’s amazement and to put it politely, get the fuck out of there.
After I see a lady being pickpocketed by a man trying to steal her entire belt, which was met with lots of running, shouting, threatening and people not caring too much as they’re glad it wasn’t them, my day became much less exciting.
I was on the verge of returning to the café and hook up with Vivienne Westwood and run away to the hills of Grenada and make sweet, sweet love. I, however, decide against that idea and instead, hunt for graffiti in the Raval.
Barcelona - Day One | 22nd April 2013
Departing the plane in Barcelona, the sky is pure blue that descends into a hazy brown of filth from air pollution, a signature sight that’s unique to Spain.
For some unbeknownst reason patience is running low for the Spanish passengers around me which considering the fact that our plane was 20 minutes ahead of schedule, seems, well, slightly odd. The lady in front of me is most frustrated and lets her feelings known to the passport officer, though she’s probably passing on praise passionately for a lovely flight.
I take my turn. The officer, grabs my passport, quickly analyses it and throws it back to me and without a smile tells me to go. I can only assume he doesn’t like hearing about people’s positive experiences and has somewhat irked him.
As my flight is early, I’m forced to hang around the arrivals hall waiting for my friend. In amongst the short conversations of constant refusal for a taxi with the local salesmen, I get a good look at the people arriving home to Spain and I can’t quite put my finger on what’s not normal about the situation.
I continue to observe and dissect the evidence in front of me to find a conclusion to this abnormality. A lady wanders the concourse wearing the skin from every animal featured on Noah’s Ark with a man looking like a reincarnation of Bob Marley as a white geography teacher. I could criticise this, but I imagine somewhere in London there’s a Spaniard criticising on how everyone dresses like they’re from Buck Rogers.
It then comes to me, what I’d failed to put my finger on, what short arms the Spanish have.
…
Arriving to my place of temporary residence, off the main street through an inconspicuous door, into a dark narrow stairwell up to a small cosy flat, I decide that getting groceries is the adult sensible thing to partake in at this very moment.
As I approach the local supermercats (or as I like to call them, Sperm Cats) I’m greeted by a homeless lady with a pot asking in the Spanish equivalent for spare change. Not knowing Spanish, I say no by giving a half smile and a shrug, she seems fine by this and I enter the store with no further hindrance.
The store is amazingly foreign and seems to only sell 4 items; croissants, sliced meat, toilet paper and wine, cheap wine, €1 for a bottle. Naturally distracted by this, I fill my basket with Spain’s finest rocket fuel pick up some croissants and pat myself on the back on a successful shop.
Leaving, the homeless lady, again, grabs my attention and instinctively I half smile and shrug. She seems upset by this until she spies my bag of groceries and her emotion changes. “Ahh, you’re English, eh? So obvious.” I’ve never been mocked by a tramp for buying alcohol before. Unsure how to cope with the situation, I simply extended my half smile/half shrug turn to full versions and casually walked off, dragging along with me load heavy bags making the soft sound of tinkering bottles and my own sadness.
6 Months in Perth: Abridged. | 1st - 8th May 2012
1st May
- Met up with a friend
- Met at a hostel
- I'm too old for hostels
- Drank a drink at the hostel
- Realised drinks in a hostel are really rather cheap
- Drank a few more drinks at the hostel
- Realised I'm not too old for hostels after all
-----
- Guys night watching films
- Evil Dead II
- Didn't remember half of what actually happened from the first time I watched this tongue-in-cheek horror
- Still a great film
- The Losers
- Modern tongue-in-cheek mindless action film
- Another great film
-----
- Last day of work, forever.
- Final drinks at The Royal
- Seemed fitting as that was the first place I had drinks when I got to Perth
- Final Champagne Thursday
-----
- Day in Freo
- Rained
- Ate breakfast at the Mussel Bar
- Grabbed a brilliantly thick hot chocolate
- Watched a film
- The Avenger
- Was freaking amazing!
- Evening in Subiaco
- Tasty woodfire pizza
- Swanky Llama Bar for swanky drinks
-----
- Another day, another film.
- Hangover II
- Reminiscing over Thailand
- Clarences for meal
- Experiences a taste of Perth's comedy fest
- Saw a trio of musical funny people called Tripod
- Funny
- Watched the FA Cup Final
- Disappointingly boring.
-----
- 50ml for breakfast
- Watched TV with one housemate
- Went for a family meal with another housemate
-----
- Breakfast overlooking the beach and overly aggressive sea at Cottesloe
- Drive to Swan Valley
- Sampled a bit of wine
- Played mini-golf
- Won mini-golf
- Back to Leederville to relax at Greens & Co.
- Played Connect 4
- Won Connect 4
- Irish Pub for a few drinks
- Home for some good ne' fashioned home made Chilli
-----
- Packed
- Cleaned
- Burrito for lunch
- Walk around Lake Monger
- Saw a tortoise!
- Burrito with friends
- Driven to the airport
6 Months in Perth: Abridged. | 12th - 30th Apr 2012
12th Apr
- R and R.
-----
- R and R.
-----
- Mini-road trip down to the Serpentine Valley
- Brilliant forests
- Great roads
- Roadside fresh fruit stalls
- More reservoirs than you can shake a stick at
- This area of Perth was a nice unexpected surprise.
- Late afternoon walking dog at the beach
- Evening Fondue party
- How VERY grown up!
- and a tad 70s
- Drinking games until 2am
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- TV
- Dog Beach
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- R and R.
-----
- R and R.
-----
18th Apr
- Thai food
Day's Verdict: Pad Thai.
-----
19th Apr
- Shopping mall fun at the food court
Day's Verdict: Hmm.
-----
20th Apr
- Authentic Italian at a small, always packed place called Il Ciao
- Nice yummy pizza
Day's Verdict: Bella.
-----
21st Apr
- 4pm drinking
- Beer pong
- Promoted to beer and rum pong
- Then just rum, no pong
- Other drinking games happened, I think
- Not overly sure.
Day's Verdict: Messy.
-----
22nd Apr
- R and R.
Day's Verdict: Nothing of interest happened.
-----
23rd Apr
- R and R.
Day's Verdict: Nothing of interest happened.
-----
24th Apr
- Out with friends to an Indonesian food place
- Went to a small bar called Frisk with a million types of gin
- Tried a club but the fights, the queue and general scum-bags, caused us to make the right decision
- Not going
- Walked home to Leederville, lost most people
- Found people
- Went to someone's house for post-food-drink-drinks
Day's Verdict: Drinky Drunky.
-----
25th Apr
- ANZAC day
- Remember the war and it's people
- Breakfast out at some chilled place reading papers
- Watch an AFL match on TV, thrilling game between two teams, one in one colour and another in a another colour.
- Cider, much much cider.
Day's Verdict: Over-exhausting.
-----
26th Apr
- R and R.
Day's Verdict: Nothing of interest happened.
-----
27th Apr
- Pad Thai night
- Watched Johnny English
- Funny
- Watched Thor
- Very very good
Day's Verdict: Blissful.
-----
28th Apr
- Day spent in the city, mooching around
- Night spent at Raffles for a 30th
- Later night spent at house party for someone's leaving event
Day's Verdict: Mixed.
-----
29th Apr
- Day in Northbridge
- Yum Cha for breakfast
- Quite a sight to be experienced
- All these carts of steamed food doing the rounds of all these random bits and pieces
- Watched acrobatic comedy
- Surprisingly good for what seemed like an amateur event planned by the city
- PICA Art gallery
- One of my favourite art galleries, so was going to enjoy it even if I didn't understand half of this 'art'
- Sunday Session
- Mount Lawley to a very nice bar called 5bar
- Drinking this incredible red wine
- Quaffing down on amazing oysters
Day's Verdict: A bloody great Sunday.
-----
30th Apr
- R and R.
Day's Verdict: Nothing of interest happened.
6 Months in Perth: Abridged. | 5th - 11th Apr 2012
5th Apr
- Champange Thursday
-----
- Hired a boat in Mandurah
- Boat, more like a floating couch.
- Set sail across the Peel Inlet down to an old mill
- Drank beers and ate food in the sunshine
- I took the helm and got everyone wet.
- Wasn't allowed to drive anymore
- Saw a dolphin
- Evening picnic at King's Park with friends
- Fell asleep and woken up by guy telling jokes
- at 2am
- Went home to sleep proper.
-----
- Meal.
-----
- TV.
-----
- R and R.
-----
- Dog sitting
- Friend round for a plate of beige food
- He never came round again
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- People
6 Months in Perth: Abridged. | 29th Mar - 4th Apr 2012
29th Mar
- Outdoor Cinema
- Watched The Rum Diary, thought it was a great film that didn't really go anywhere.
- It also rained.
- Chairs were also uncomfortable.
-----
30th Mar
- Night in downtown
- Cheeky sparrow, typical alcohol/food place for people with too much money and not enough fashion sense.
- Amplifier Bar, typical alcohol/music place for people with too little money and not enough fashion sense.
Day's Verdict: Fashion seems to be a problem in Perth.
-----
31st Mar
- Watched Synchronised swimming.
- Tiny Malaysian robots were incredible
- The rest were a bit shit
- Saw Australian team that are going to London Olympics
Day's Verdict: I didn't feel the over-need for a shotgun to the face.
-----
1st Apr
- Breakfast at my new favourite place, 50ml.
- Chilled-ish
- Paddleboarding afterwards.
- Energetic-ish
- Cooked pesto stuffed mushrooms.
- Tasty-ish
Day's Verdict: Just a day-ish.
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2nd Apr
- R and R.
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3rd Apr
- Drank a hot chocolate
Day's Verdict: Action packed.
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4th Apr
- R and R.
6 Months in Perth: Tourist Edition. | 15th - 28th Mar 2012
My mummy is making a gigantic trip
from one side of the world to the other on her lonesome to some see
me down-under. Ahh, how nice and how pleasant!
This also means an action-packed
fun-filled road-weary scenery-overloaded itinerary that has been
planned by me over the next couple of days, as I drag my mummy around
Perth and surrounding areas, we both explore this place together for
the first time.
-----
15th March
Mum arrived and had a Chinese with my
housemates, to be what I consider an explosive start to the
itinerary!
16th March
I had to work
during the day leaving a blank space of events until I returned, to
hear my mum getting ready to go out to The Garden in Leederville with
the girls from home and work, which oddly I wasn't formally invited
to, as I'm sure these devious girl were just after getting gossip on
me, I duly put it upon myself to gatecrash the event therefore
regulating and stopping any vicious lies and rumours from being
spread about me.
17th March
Going for a walk
in the car, I drive us through the 'burbs from Leederville down to
Matilda Bay and along the Swan River to end up at Cottesloe Beach for
a late tasty breakfast of, blah on blah with a side salsa baked
beans.
The annual event
of sculptures by the sea was still going on so we walked along the
bustling beach in-and-around the various indoor and outdoor displays,
looking at and deciphering metal steps, ambiguous bodies, sandbag
living rooms, fabric things with trunks, shoes made of maps,
multicoloured cars, red pigs and rods of perspex.
Leaving Cottesloe,
we drove up the coast past the scrub dune land, to City Beach to
spend the afternoon, soaking the sun while walking along the sand and
partaking in a little bit of swimming/not drowning.
From there we
drove back in land towards Perth's Downtown and to East Perth to take
a late afternoon walk from Claisebrook Cove along the riverfront,
passing the WACA we spot some dolphins, which was met with lots of
verbal ecstatic liveliness, continuing to the Lucky Shag by Perth's
infamous bell tower for a post-walk lager cooler. We finish the walk
going through the gardens near the council building and getting a CAT
bus back to East Perth.
Evening brought
entertainment in the form of an Aussie BBQ by the pool, hosted by a
Scottish friend, cooked by an Englishman, and mostly attended by
everyone else, though mainly Scottish...
18th March
Morning walk on
the Dog Beach down near North Fremantle with my housemate, always a
good spot when you're feeling a little dog sick to help realise that
your own dog would probably panic kill most of the dogs here, if
placed in this situation.
We drove north to
Matilda Bay so my housemate and I, could teach mum how to paddleboard
which considering her timid and stiff scared paddling and balancing
technique managed to accomplish half hour of getting out and back
without falling in, very impressive!
My housemate and I
ditch my mum on the shoreside as we went for a proper paddle to annoy
some pelicans. We returned back to shore and sat on the riverside
looking at the other energetic people, then, we spot some dolphins,
which was met with lots of verbal ecstatic liveliness.
After a early
afternoon rest and recoup, we drove back down the Fremantle to
experience the joys it has so that'll be a packed Little Creatures
brew house, a look at The Roundhouse and 'umming' and 'ahhing' at old
building in the vicinity.
The evening we had
a meal at Clancy's Fish Restaurant at City Beach as we (I'm sure
there were other there, not sure now) all watched the sunset.
19th March
Driving north to
Caversham a small out posted village in nowhere's ville, we
eventually find in amongst all the oddly placed attractions, namely
the steam engine train museum, the Wildlife park, where we enjoyed
looking at animals from all over Australia, which was a pleasant
experience, though anything behind cages, especially birds is a bit
awkward, regardless the main reason for being there was to see
kangaroos and that we did, in a central enclosure we walked amongst
them as they bounced, lied and poop'd around us as we coaxed them to
come near us with free food.
Driving further
north, we enter the Swan Valley and experienced a few wine tastings,
though mostly enjoyed the chocolate factory snooping, overwhelming
coffee tasting and information overload and the unbelievably serene
and tasty lunch overlooking the vineyard of River's Edge.
We continued our
exploration as we aimed the car towards the Perth hills, where we
were greeted with hazy views over Perth and (personally fun, probably
less so for mum) empty country roads, we stopped off at Kookaburra
for a small walk into the forest the treated us to a spectacular view
over the Mundaring Reservoir and neighbouring hills.
As we began our
long way back drive to Perth we passed the dam we'd saw from above
and walked along it, and admired the old pump station and further
views through and over the hills on one side as still wind tampered
surface of the water adjacent were reflecting the tree line and sky
almost perfectly.
20th March
Today we head
south, deep south, not that deep, but deep enough, to Margaret River.
The drive was
typical with long brick walls, motorways with the occasional
deviation through to the Scenic Tourist Drive, which was both scenic
and a drive, not much in the way of tourist though, we stopped off at
Bunbury to take in the panoramic view of Bunbury from the aptly name
Rotary View, before grabbing a quick coffee from some social
club-on-sea
Arriving into
Margaret River, we check into our unbelievably amazing apartment,
with its high bright ceilings over an open planned layout with a
large balcony overlooking the forest, which was a little bit
unexpected.
We head out to
stretch our legs and get our orientation as we walk through town and
down along Margaret River itself, stopping off along the way to ask
some commoner with a regal attitude where the path for the walk
begins.
The walk along the
river was so calming with the sights and sounds of real nature,
snapshots between gaps of the trees as the river created a
jungle-like view with small sand islands with dead Karri trees poke
out of the water, with kookaburras flying around as mum sang the
accompanying theme song for them.
Crossing a quiet
part of the river over a dam, we were treated to something I found,
so incredible and calming; the sun was beaming down on the mirror
like river onto our faces, a cloud above started to gently burst with
soft raindrops that floated towards and around us like gentle cherry
blossom, the wind meandered and rippled in between the trees leaving
long rippled footprints on the water's surface, all the while a duck
was idly swimming and quaking along, unaware of all this goings on.
Walking back into
town, it was happy hour so we stopped off at Corners Bar for a drink
outside as we feigned a intellectual conversation to really bitch and
judge other people that were coming in and out of the bar. The
evening was spent relaxing with a Goodfellas salmon pizza while
watching a film or documentary on the telebox.
21st March
Expedition today
of Margaret River's Cave Road. Starting off at Edward's wine makers
which was closed, but wanted to show mum the story of the owner who
flew an old bright yellow plane from Bristol, UK to Margaret River.
Next we drove
further north, to Gracetown a small hilly village situated on the
middle of the this South-Western Australian peninsular, we parking up
after a small bit of off-roading and a lizard sighting, we arrive to
a brilliant outlook of the ocean and surrounding cliffs, we walk down
a few hundred steps to the beach to walk along the sand and get a
better look at the surfers carving wakes into these massive waves.
Driving back south
through the landscape of farming, cattle, deer and grapes we stop off
a the Historical site of Ellensbrook a farm, or something, a small
white building surrounded by burnt trees and the like.
Continuing south,
Surfer's Point at Prevelin Beach was our next destination where the
Margaret River Pro Surfing Competition was on, we didn't stay for
long, but long enough for me to see prolific surfer and world
champion, Kelly Slater.
Our drive south to
Leeuwin Lighthouse in Augusta saw us blown away by a truly
spectacular and unbelievable section of the Boranup Karri Forest,
that was magical and out of this world, a look beneath the canopy and
behind the bushes as this section presented you with an endless view
of seemingly bright white bark, it's hard to explain it as anything
but, awesome. Lighthouse was OK.
Taking a scenic
drive back up north via Flinder's Bay to learn about whaling and
Hardy's Inlet to admire the kite and windsurfers, we spot some
dolphins, which was met with lots of verbal ecstatic liveliness.
Venturing back
into the forest we stop off at Jewel Cave to be guided through the
largest/biggest touristic cave in the world, which was both large,
big, wonderful, errie, informative, very impressive and when the
lights are off, dark. Probably could've been made better had our
guide been less concerned about the animals that were trapped down
here years and years ago and more about something else like, rock.
Afterwards we head
to my favourite spot, Hamelin Bay a large open sandy bay with a
shallow reef and magnificent mysterious limestone cliffs, walking
towards said cliffs passing the remnants of an old shipping pier,
there was something in the waves. A big bastard of a stingray, that's
what, which took mum by surprise.
Walking along the
beach as the sun began to drop, the clouds come to cool the place
off, we decided to try and get to a prime spot to admire the sunset
at its best, Boranup Outlook, driving a Toyota Corolla getting
semi-lost in semi-offroad conditions in a forest at nightfalling
probably wasn't the best idea I've ever had.
The reward up top
was more than enough, worth the danger for me, with panoramic views
over the top of the forest canopy streaming down to the ocean as the
sun, hidden from view by a slither of clouds sitting on the distant
horizon, was a murky orange explosion as it eventually got dark and
the first stars started to come out, it was time to head home.
22nd March
Margaret River is
food and wine country, so obviously that calls for a wine tour and
being guided around some of the estates to see if their produce is up
to standards.
Starting off at
the big beautiful estate of the Watershed, where we were taught how
to appreciate and drink wine as we worked our way up and down the
reds and whites, then we off we went to Leeuwin estate tucked away in
the forests, famous for its outdoor festivals that pulls in 'the big
names' and it's extensive and expensive barrel room art gallery in
the basement. Voyager estate for an amazing lunch and tasting, based
on a South African villa with fantastic a rose garden kept by 7
gardeners.
Afterwards, we
visited a boutique establishment that specialised in not just wine,
but nougat also, obviously food was appearing more into our schedule
to help sober us up, as we then visited the chocolate and cheese
factories, before continuing the liquid testing at another boutique
place that made lots of sweet wines and very seemed knowledgeable
about alpacas and pigs. We finished up at a brewery, where I got a
paddle taster of 5 or 6 different beers.
That evening was a
little bit humiliating as I pretty much passed out on the sofa while
mum kept on trucking and being lively.
23rd March
Our last day in
Margaret River, we grabbed a very good coffee to start our day at
McHenry's and drove north to Bunker Bay, stopping off at beaches and
various interesting points along the way from Moses Rock beach,
Injidup Point with it's amazing deep sanded empty and serene beach,
Super Tubes beach, Canal Rocks, with it's impressive display of water
smashing and coursing through the rocks, Yallingup village for
watching surfers at it's big busy beach and Cape Naturaliste where we
were bombarded and swarmed by flies, then at Bunker Bay enjoying
another peaceful sunny beach walk before grabbing a drink at a nearby
beach side cafe.
Leaving there via
a short and scenic Eagle Road we begin our drive back to Perth,
stopping off at Busselton Jetty, the longest jetty of its kind in the
Southern Hemisphere, and yes, they'd be right, it was long, very
long, pretty though.
Deviating from the
highway home, we snuck into a very atmospheric and quiet Tuart
Forest, wide unmarked roads bordered by big established trees with
the occasional small farm building, one of an historical importance
as the forest mellowed away into marsh land, following the road from
here to a small village attached to an endlessly long narrowish calm
beach called Peppermint Tree, tranquil was is the only word that
comes to mind with this area.
Driving back onto
the main highway and the sun was dropping deep, we get ambushed by
hundred of Kangaroos as they littered the sides of the roads and
near-by field.
Time was getting
tight but we managed to reach Bunbury again and complete our
holiday-within-a-holiday at the social club-on-sea to have a drink
and watch the sun go down, marking the end of an incredible trip down
to Margaret River.
24th March
After an energetic
trip the last few days, taking it easy was definitely on the agenda
for today, and there's nothing more relaxing than a 15 mile walk
around Perth, from Leederville to Harbour Town and into Perth City,
exploring the Barracks, shops, historical buildings and eventually
making our way to the lacklustre King's Park, though the war memorial
and the view over Perth was interesting.
Heading back to
Perth and stopping off at The Aviary for a late, late lunch we cross
Horseshoe bridge into Northbridge and explore the more creative Asian
side of the area, stopping off at the pretentious but actually quite
good PICA, before heading back to Leederville to collapse.
25th March
Exploration of the
North today, as we drove to Scarborough (OK), Trigg (Quiet) and North
(Good) Beaches before stopping off at Hillary's to explore the
harbour area and see all the British ex-pats annoyingly enjoying
themselves.
Continuing up
Ocean Reef Road to Burns Beach and more sedate, still British heavy
beach, surrounded seemingly moronic mass of tightly compacted large
gardenless villas and to be greeted by a man on a giant motorised
parachute floating up and down the coastline.
Reaching Mindarie
Keys Harbour, a low key and relaxed area, with houses close to the
calm waters with accompanying large boats, and a long section of
bars and restaurants, all naturally filled up with British people
speaking loud inane nonsense about the weather and Spam ruined what
would've been a nice pit-stop. Heading back south, to see what Lake
Joonadlup was all about, seeing as it was dry and filled with British
people having BBQs with their kids, not much of any interest was
going on.
The evening we had
a rather pleasant BBQ in suburbia with real certified Australians!
26th March
Exploration of the
South today, as we drove to Mandurah and enjoyed a cruise through the
canals and estuary, admiring the intriguing war memorial, even more
intriguing mostly ugly large manors and seeing lots of wildlife and
being told lots of history about the place.
Heading north to
Rockingham and Point Peron for a small beach walk then through to
East Rockingham for an ice cream break, overlooking the causeway to
the military base on Garden Island.
Afterwards, we
went spent some time reflecting at the giant war memorial at Kwinana
and going 'wow' a lot at the top half of a submarine, before
exploring the industrial side of Perth with its oil refineries,
marine centres and various other things that were going on there,
even though it sounds a bit bleak, I found it to be quite marvelling,
as I'd never seen anything like that, on that scale before.
Getting back to
nature we became one again with the countryside as we took a quick
stop at Woodman Point in Coogee to walk along the pier filled with
fishermen, tame inquisitive pelicans and we spot some dolphins,
which was met with lots of verbal ecstatic liveliness.
The sun was
starting to set so, we decided to get a sundowner at the Left Bank in
Fremantle, watching boats and traffic pass us by as we recalled all
the photos that were taken, albeit were forced to take.
With the sun
orange remnants on the horizon, we drive to one of my favourite spots
of Perth via the suburbs of impressive houses to, Point Walter, a
parkland that has a spit of sandy beach that reaches out into one of
the corners of the meandering Swan River, as traces of the sun truly
disappeared.
27th March
A quiet relaxed
day, as it was my mum's last day, starting off with a spot o'
shopping in the morning and driving the wrong way and ending up being
way inland and up far north (instead of west and south) but we did
see some large satellites, so ever cloud...
Arriving at our
intended destination, City Beach we spend a few hours, soaking in the
sun, body surfing and general relaxation and recouping.
We leave City
Beach and drive to Downtown to have lunch at the C Restaurant, a
revolving restaurant with great views over Kings Park, Swan River,
Downtown, surrounding suburbs, with great visibility that day, we
could see for miles all around us to the Hills, Fremantle, Ocean and
beyond.
We walk around the
shops and take an (accidental) drive down the river and spend the
afternoon doing nothing.
The evening saw us
back at City Beach with housemates, friends etc. basically everyone,
to admire one last sunset and tasty food at Clancy's, before driving
mum to the airport and making sure she gets on that bloody plane out
of here!
-----
Busy, immensely
fun and very rewarding time spent with mum, exploring all that Perth
and its areas has to offer, amazing scenes, tastes, sounds,
information and just beautiful, something that I will treasure
forever, if not, a fairly long time until a better experience comes
along.
6 Months in Perth: Abridged. | 4th - 14th Mar 2012
4th Mar
- Explore Fremantle
- Saw a museum with lots of boats
- Boring
- Found a brewery called Monk's
- Ate fresh paella, was very good
- Drank a paddle of beer, various taste testing. very insightful
- Found a cafe
- Ate some cake, was what is was.
-----
- Ferry down the tame Swan River and across the wild ocean to Rottnest.
- Walked around to a few beaches
- Snorkelled within the water of those few beaches
- Though conditions were a bit rubbish
- Fish were a bit sparse
- Fun all the same!
- Saw a Quokka
- Tiny rat Kangaroo thing
- Fed it, seemed appreciative.
- Ate pizza at Little Caesar's
-----
6th Mar
- R and R.
-----
7th Mar
- R and R.
-----
- Clancy's fish bar at City Beach
- Woo, sunset and food!
-----
- According to my notes we had a house party?
-----
- 25 mile bike ride around beaches, towns and river
- Didn't see one single soul
- Both lovely and unnerving.
- Saw the sculptures art exhibition at Cottesloe beach
- Probably the best art installation I've ever seen and enjoyed, if not ever, in a really long time.
- Was weird seeing a piece of art that was borrowed from Vancouver
- Evening Jazz
- Except that it wasn't jazz
- It was in fact, very full on soul
- Not that enjoyable as I was expecting jazz
- Is a little bit of jazz too much to ask for, at the jazz club?
-----
11th Mar
- Paddleboard session in the morning
- Saw a freaking dolphin!
- It went right under my board!
- How freaking cool is that!
- Went back to Cottesloe
- Looked at the sculptures again, still interesting
- Went for a long doggy paddle
- Lunch at the beach hotel
- Swim in friend's pool
-----
- R and R.
-----
- Farewell to a visiting friend's
- Poolside BBQ was the order of the day
- Great fun
-----
- Steak salad with friends
- Relaxation featured highly
Thailand. Part VII. | Mar 2nd/3rd
Time to leave Koh
Phangan and everything would have to run smoothly as my friend and I,
only foolishly gave ourselves 3 hours, between arriving into Bangkok,
get across the urban sprawl, check in and our flight taking off for
Perth.
Setting off at
11am, we get a taxi to the ferry terminal and greeted by a hoard of
backpackers standing around, some were like dead-expressionless
animals grazing in a field others were enthusiastically measuring
dicks to see who'd had the most rewarding experience through beer.
After some
confusion of why our ferry wasn't here yet, we found out it was
delayed a few minutes, this is off to a good start, taking shade from
the sun and its heat under a tree we wait 30 minutes until the pack
of backpackers start shuffling along the pier towards a boat, we put
on our blank expressions and follow them.
We find some
outside on the boat and sit down with our legs dangling over the edge
and let the boat do it's thing, as everything is out of our hands for
the time being, taking in the scenery as we rock through the waves of
distant islands experiencing the wet cooling of a cloud burst.
Arriving at the
ferry we're ushered onto our patiently waiting coaches and start our
long drive to the train station, looking at the normal life these
people live and how they're unaware of our tourist eyes looking upon
them thinking it's a fairly strange and tough way of life. Then you
see a £50,000 pick-up truck roar past someone selling fruit on
the roadside, then you think 'Well, it can't be that bad'
As this journey
went on, the health of the coach deteriorated rapidly, apparently
something to do with the clutch, until eventually we pulled over and
stopped. Our driver then decided to start a fight with the gear
stick, accelerator pedal, and whatever else he could fight with from
his seat until the coach gave up being a dick and started up again
and off we went.
We got to the
train station and after much bundling and running around the area to
get food, snacks and supplies we got to the platform to find out the
train was delayed 70 minutes. Well, that's just fucking grand!
Waiting around on
the platform as the sun set and darkness covered everything, I dashed
off to the toilet and I got offered a sexual act by a Thai boy in a
Chelsea top, I said no and left there as fast as I could. Thankfully
it was also at that point the train arrived late on time.
Settling into our
quarters we ask the conductor what time the train is planning to
arrive into Bangkok to be met with a reply of 'On time, we make time
up, over night', we could now relax.
The train was
comfortable as we opted for first class this time round, so we were
gifted with our own room to spend the night chatting, playing
drinking games and reminiscing.
...
First class was a
rough noisy uncomfortable sleep, looking at our watch it was
Blahblugh o'clock, I knew whatever time that was displayed on my
watch didn't look good to making our arrival time into Bangkok, and
as the train got closer and closer to the city, it was getting more
and more delayed. Not an overly relaxing morning wake up call.
We were, however,
treated to a wonderful sunrise over Bangkok that helped relieve some
of the stress, even though there was nothing to really worry about,
as our airline made 3 flights a day from Bangkok to Perth and we were
catching the first one of the day.
The delays were
getting ridiculous as stops at each station were getting longer and
longer, we decided to jump out at the next stop, wherever it was, and
risk our success of getting to the airport in a taxi.
We pile out of the
train and say a swift goodbye to our friends as we ran down the
street to try and hail a cab, this process seemed to have taken way
too long, it felt like 15 minutes when it was actually just a few. We
eventually get a one by running further down the street and
more-or-less running into the taxi.
Bundling in, we
say something to effect of 'Airport, and step on it!' then we looked
at our driver and realised that wasn't going to be possible as he's
older than the moon, but we should've of been so dismissive as all
motor vehicles in Thailand are built with potent accelerator pedals
and without brakes, asking 'How long it would take?', 'Not long, only
5 minutes' We relaxed, again, on this journey.
Problems seem to
arise when we relax, because 5 minutes in Thailand seem to equate to
around 30 English minutes, and mild panicking started to set in,
especially coming so far to fall at the last hurdle.
Getting to the
airport, we run into a chaotic mess of lost wandering people with
large bags and confusing screens of flight information, none of which
seemed to really relate to our flight, my eyes suffering from rapid
eye movement didn't blind as I was trying to digest and process all
this information, none of which made any sense in my panic, it all
looked like hieroglyphics in English.
Then, Yes! There
you are! and we ran, nay galloped through the crowds, contorting our
bodies around others as we were sliding under pulled luggage, jumping
over midgets, it felt like a extreme live-action version of Frogger.
Getting to the
check-in area, I spot the woman who was just about to close the
counter, dashing over I slapped my passport on the desk, followed
shortly by a second slap of my friend's passport. “Hello, we're
here” we say in an exhausted, flustered, cool kind of way.
We walk over to
the long line of security and customs and check our passes, the
boarding time was exactly the same as what was being stated on my
watch and the line didn't appear to be moving.
I grab the
attention of a security girl and point at the time on the boarding
pass and at my watch and let out a small pathetic yelp, she got on
her walkie-talkie and we were processed through the VIP entrance.
After a thousand
thank yous we sprint to the gate and sat down on the plane, 2 minutes
later the doors were shut, as we prepare for take-off.
We arrive into the ever-welcoming shit-heap of Perth airport and get a taxi home, this journey door to door took 37 hours, shattered I do the sensible thing, go out to the pub and meet with friends for a few drinks.
We arrive into the ever-welcoming shit-heap of Perth airport and get a taxi home, this journey door to door took 37 hours, shattered I do the sensible thing, go out to the pub and meet with friends for a few drinks.
Thailand... Large
Chang fuelled fun.
Thailand. Part VI. | Mar 1st
Late start to the
day, arising at around 1, as others were nursing their zombie-like
ways me and the previous night's nurses hired some snorkelling gear
and went off to explore what was under the water's surface.
It wasn't that
interesting, at first, just a long expanse of shallow water and sand
with many many sea cucumbers, boring.
Things did get
interesting when we crossed paths with these black long-spined sea urchins that looked menacing as these dark black
spiky balls slowly moved themselves into position, on top of one
another to create some sort of urch-double-chin.
As I'd never been
snorkelling before, I was fascinated by that for way too long, we
continued out further to open water and the sand shelf felt like it
suddenly disappeared and we were confronted with this amazing reef,
it literally blew me out the water, how incredible it was.
Fish of all
shapes, colours and sizes bustling about in their own little
underwater city in packs, with coral buildings swaying in the water,
I could only best describe it as, it looked like a mixture of the
film Shark's Tale and The Warriors.
I had an amazing
time diving down into the depths of water to get a closer look of
these strange and unusual animals I've never seen before, I couldn't
get over how this looked like someone exploded a massive fish tank
into the water it just spread everywhere like poison ivy, it was that
good, if not better!
Thailand. Part V. | Feb 29th
Today was going to be a long day,
thankfully most memories are hazy so it shouldn't be long to
recollect.
It started out sensibly enough, with
the need to explore off-foot, we found a taxi outside our resort who
would turn out to be our own personal chauffeur for the whole day, I
can't remember his name so I'll call him Lloyd McKenzie, he was
extremely friendly and helpful.
Lloyd McKenzie drove us on the northern
stretch of road passing villages, road-side shops, homes, jungle
forest, avoiding various street furniture such as scooters, people
and dogs to our first destination a Chinese Buddhist temple.
It was a very modern concrete heavy
temple, that looks like it had just been freshly repainted set within
the hills with a great view, and ignoring the fact that it didn't
look overly aesthetic, it had a very quiet and serene atmosphere.
Looking around the statues of the gods and admiring the Taoism used
within the architecture, we left the temple.
Lloyd McKenzie took us to a village
that we'd passed on the way there called Fisherman's Village, as the
name suggests a village, with a lovely long bay beached area, with
hills descending down into the horizon into the crystal clear water
and a few fishing boats moored up on the beach front, this place was
majorly unexpected and a chorus and repetition of 'wow' could be
heard as we all grabbed our cameras to savour the scenary.
We went to a beach-front bar and
relaxed lying down in its lounge area, while sipping on drinks we
have probably the only ever conversation that's been had at that bar
to the effects of 'surely it can't be that hard to open a bar here,
on the beach, listening to awesome music, with cold beers. It would
be awesome!' - it was about that point the power went out, it didn't
deter us of our dream though.
Lloyd McKenzie drove us back to Smile
Beach and some of us relaxed lying on the grass outside our rooms
reading or sleeping and generally saving energy for the night ahead,
the half moon party.
Time was getting long in the tooth and
we an idea was planted that tonight's event required vests and
fluorescent face paints, so the group stupidly sent off the two
people to pick our vests for us, as a 'fun surprise'.
They returned with the look of naughty
children, this wasn't going to be good, and instead of unveiling the
vests there and then we decided to wait until later... Lots of tense
moments passed as we got ready for the night and we all convened
again for the big presentation ceremony.
They started off strong with bright 80s
head and wristbands, but then it was instantly learnt that you don't
sent off two buffoon douchebags to do the work of sane thinking
people; they, of course, got themselves respectable vests with black
and white obscure photography on it, another two had Rolling Stones
lips and a fish or something and another two, were what could only be
described as, shite. One said 'No Money, No Honey', another 'Sex
Instructor, First lesson free'.
After mourning the death of giving a
good idea to idiots, we sucked it up, got a few pop-band photos and
went to the beach for nice relaxing meal to build up on stodge, I got
the meal, but not the relaxing.
Due to the set up of the restaurant's
tables on the beach, they seat everyone to look out on upon the
water, but as there wasn't enough room on this particular table,
someone would have to sit on the opposite side of the table with
their back to the water facing everyone. That person was me.
I can cope looking at my friends for a
duration of a meal, I don't find that too stressful, I do find being
singled out by our waiter on the other hand, very unnerving.
His over-affectionate verbal nature of
wanting to carry me to my room when I get drunk and his hands
touching me with belly rubs and hugs, saw the smile from my face
being wiped off as it was replaced blank friendly endurance to end
this situation as soon as possible without violence.
In order for that to happen, he made a
deal with me, he would give me a free large bottle of Chang beer if I
downed it straight away or I would have to buy him two. I was
hesitant at first, because I am rubbish at downing drinks, it's not
something I can do, but peer-pressure saw me accept.
After a few minutes of blissful silence
as he went off and got the beer, he quickly returned with the bottle
and opened it up. I took in a deep breath as a stalling tactic while
I prayed the ground would swallow him whole, I take the bottle and I
slowly chug away and after what felt like hours of drinking this damn
beer, I was done and I could finally relax.
Not so, as our waiter was
over-enthusiast that I drank a whole beer, he felt it appropriate to
be more over-affectionate than he was before. I was not in a good
place at that moment.
The waiter eventually fucked off and
the alcohol surged through my veins and I cheered up a little, as we
met Lloyd McKenzie who drove us to the south of the island for the
Halfmoon Party.
...
Arriving at 9, the place was empty.
Hm, that's a little crap, though for an
all night event you don't want to get there too early, still gave us
a good opportunity to look around; it was dark, but from what I can
remember, the venue was set in a big open space within the jungle
with a stage at one end, a dancing platform in the middle of the
dance floor with a giant pole holding up a large canopy, opposite end
of the stage was a large wooden structure that housed one of the many
bars that looked over the main dance floor, in and around the main
space were waterfalls, sitting areas, food stalls, paint shops, etc.
etc. Also the whole place was lit by UV lights.
While it was empty we put on the
fluorescent paint on our faces, representing our beings and self-awesomeness in our fuzzy drunken state and to be honest I can't remember seeing anyone enough to register their decals, I was like a douchey Hulk Hogan though, if that gives you any direction of mind imagery of what was going on.
Time passed and we
left at 430am, what happened in between?
- One friend
drank too much, too quickly and ended up having a good ol' sleep in a
flower bed by around 11.
- So, two
friends looked after him and nursed him as best as they could,
leaving him for dead every-so-often enjoy dancing and the like.
- Another
friend went into a manhunt mode, but hunting for girls with bear
hugs, he randomly disappeared, only to be found later when we got
back asleep in his bed.
- I was on the
stage, hand pushing the air for pretty much the entirety of the
event, occasionally being stopped by people giving me much love for
my body paint.
- Our last
remaining friend disappeared until 1030 the next morning, not knowing
much of what happened in the last 12 hours.
At the end, a very
welcomed Lloyd McKenzie was waiting outside with big grin and walked
us to his taxi where we had a tranquil drive, like being in rally car
during a race, back to the resort.
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